Have you ever met a cancer survivor? How about learning valuable life lessons from the person? Recently I met a dear colleague of mine at a board meeting. She’s a breast cancer survivor. I learned about the news first-hand, from her – but that was about 9 months ago. Met her at a meeting that I had to leave early, and didn’t have the chance to hear her story until recently.
This time, at the board meeting, she came in and sat next to me. She told me that she just published an ebook. I could see she was quite excited sharing the good news and added, Thanks to Prof. Karim for conducting the workshop on ‘Publishing Ebook Made Easy’ for educators.
Yes, the workshop is always full. To the brim.
Since attending the workshop by Prof. Karim, I have published three ebooks – Solo Jordan, Solo Mabul and Creative Online Icebreakers for Online Instructors with Dr. Radziah Adam. The first two are visual travel guides for independent travellers. The third book on online icebreakers came out from a collaborative effort with Dr Radziah as USM MOOC managers. It is written for lecturers in mind, who are transitioning from face-to-face to online teaching.
And I have more in the pipeline 😎
The therapeutic power of writing
I must say, writing a book is an arduous effort. It’s a craft.
Yet interestingly, writing can also get quite addictive. That is… when ‘in the zone’. Words simply flow. Like a river flowing downstream, free and unhindered.
Then, when it comes to publishing and sharing the book with the world… it feels so good. Exhilarating to say the least.
So was my colleague. She seemed quite excited sharing her new book. A quiet excitement. The ebook is based her blog. A blog that she started as she finds that writing about her journey as a cancer patient feels therapeutic.
I agreed with her on that point.
Similar to having conversations or venting out, writing is an act of expressing oneself. Where one processes emotions, thoughts and feelings. Where one gives a label to those ‘indescribable’ or convoluted inner state of mind.
Writing a blog on your life journey and experiences can further organise, clarify and serve as a mirror to those inner side of things. A reflection. A healing tool. For Self and others.
Three lessons from the ebook
This is my first time reviewing a book on my blog. I feel compelled to share this with you; though I don’t want to give away the best parts of her story.
The ebook is quite informative to readers looking for ways to cope with cancer, or having close relatives suffering from one. It’s an account that interweaves personal stories and scientific information.
Worth spending 1-2 hours reading the ebook. A weekend reading.
… it seems there is no veil between you and the readers.
In the book, the author takes the readers through quite a journey. From an abrupt change of diet to functional food, her experiences managing the cancer diagnosis, the effects and side-effects of drugs, cycles of chemotherapy and radiotherapy to dealing with volatile emotions and what to say to people with cancer.
If there is a second edition of the ebook, I wish there would be more information on the function(s) of each functional food listed in the ebook. It would be interesting to learn how they could work in synergy in boosting the immune system, and combat the cancer cells.
Below I highlight three most meaningful and interesting lessons from the ebook:
#Lesson1
Don’t be fooled by the illusions of Life. In the pursuit of ‘success’, one chases after the 5C’s: Careers, marriage, children, cars, credit cards and condos. The rat races.
Impermanence is a key universal characteristic of Life.
Live from one moment to the next. To take one day at a time. Be present with oneself and observe the things, people and events around you with a new pair of eyes. In her ebook, the author includes photos of flowers, from buds to full blooms. Beautiful snapshots showing the beauty and its impermanence.
#Lesson2
Apart from learning a new word i.e. chemoflatulence, I found the chapter on ‘What not to say to someone facing cancer’ quite useful. Often, we would be loss for words when your colleague or close ones break the ‘bad’ news/diagnosis.
We would then attempt to ‘soothe’ the cancer patient by saying sorry. Or give encouraging words, quoting from the ebook – “Don’t worry, miracles are bound to happen. I will pray for you”. Or a downright distasteful statement, “My sister’s friend has the same cancer like yours and she’s dead in six months”.
Interestingly, I learned that the word ‘sorry’ may be the least helpful for a cancer patient. One could simply offer help by gifting some functional food or asking how the person’s feeling that day.
In the hindsight, these words are not really meant to soothe the cancer patient. Unfortunately, many people hardly know how to respond to a bad news. The words serve as a balm for the receiver(s). Or a projection of a receiver’s discomfort with the reality. It’s nothing personal.
#Lesson3
Knowing that the breast cancer can potentially be terminal… I cannot even start to pretend to be in her shoes. From my reading, I could only imagine how difficult her journey was. How uncomfortable going through all the drug regimens, side effects and change of lifestyles. The reality of Life.
And how hard to accept the reality. Quite painful…
But necessary. Once one is willing to accept the reality, one can find ways to cope with what Life throws at you (or offers you). It’s about adopting a different mindset.
On top of all that, she has the courage to share her personal story with the world. As I said to my colleague at the meeting, it seems there is no veil between you and the readers.
Being authentic and candid about one’s personal experience dealing with breast cancer is not easy. But her journey and experiences have tremendously helped many people dealing with theirs. It gives hope.
And a reason to live another day.
Get a copy of Melanie T’s ebook, Managing a Diagnosis of Breast Cancer, A Different Mindset from Kobo.
